Monday, February 4

I'm like a bird

I DO want to fly!!!

I was telling /t that I have this little collection of Story People by an American Artist, Bill Andreas. One of them is called Flying Woman. The old link didn't work but you can look it up if you're interested under 'prints' at:

I see this is true in my life. I have 3 stories. Two I identified with and one was aspirational.

I think its time for a new story.

Ironically, my leave to remain in England expired Friday. Yes, I did consider letting it expire and returning to Canada, but I have things I need to see through here. Now, I am without a passport while my permit is being extended. A foreigner on foreign soil. I'm trapped!!!

I'm not a person who adapts easily to having her freedom curtailed.

I couldn't get this song out of my head yesterday. Oh, Ruela and I will probably argue over whether Nelly Furtato is Canadian or Portuguese. And actually, as an immigrant to Canada, she is both. The beautiful woman is clearly Portuguese, the beautiful landscape is clearly Canadian. And as an emigrant from Canada on two continents now, I understand the phrase: "I don't know where my soul is, I don't know where my home is."

When I first heard her sing, I felt Nelly described me perfectly. I'd just returned from India...was living in New York and trying to decide whether to move to India, Vancouver or maybe London. Funny really...I ended up in India sort of by accident on a yoga teaching stint and ended up starting a small charity that partnered with an orphanage, when really, my intention was to go work with Aids orphans in Africa.

I moved around alot when I was a kid and I'd seen most of North America by the time I was 16. Being rootless can be disorienting....or liberating....and so every time I have had a life decision to make, one of the factors about which I have the least fear is 'where.'

For the moment and for the next little while, geography is settled...but I'm on a life mission with this next step, and where is becoming more important. One thing I know is that London is not where my soul is...London is not my home. And what seems a long time can pass soon again...I'll find my wings...


Fede said...

It is hard to tell. I am starting wondering where I belong to as well. No clue yet. But I do prefer to be suspended and feel the discontinuities and fractions in life that buried into a pre-packaged role in it. And then who knows, who knows what's behind the corner. Keep going!
Good night and good luck.

Claire said...

What a great post! I love that song and haven't heard it in a good long while... Hope all the admin goes well!


Anonymous said...

will be
a flamingo! <3

portuguese girls(!)

¤ ¤ ¤


Ruela said...

but with a beautiful canadian look,
like you Pink.

RE: Yes, 3 days of rock,
The Sisters of Mercy, Peter Murphy, The Prodigy, Tricky, ex:Doors...


All my favourites together...this is not real and right Here.

Serena Joy said...

I really like Nelly Furtato, and I hope you aren't left feeling at loose ends and curtailed for long.:)

The Lone Beader said...

I starting to feel that way - that Boston is not my home. But, I LOVE London! That would be a fab home! I would never be bored! LOL.

puerileuwaite said...

Not that it matters to anyone but me ... but this is indeed WAY better than the version from Jodie Foster's "Nell" character. That one was too hard to follow.

puerileuwaite said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Indigo said...

halo incarnates

would like to see england too. indigo has passport. could do it.

glad you love halo. glad you aren't afraid

Ur-spo said...

a good rule is live where you soul is; it is best to get out of london if this is the matter.

Pink said...

Fede - Whats behind the corner is only and everything that you can imagine!

Pink said...

Thank you Claire!

/t - a Pink flamingo!!! - I always wanted longer legs - yay!

Ruela - how wonderful! It is real...imprint it in your memory if it brings you joy!

Thanks SJ - I've mostly got loose stools at the moment, rather than loose ends ;) That flu thats been knocking at my door hit me good today but now that its is a sign that the body is winning and health will return.

Beadie - London loves you too!


Pink said...

Nell sure was original pugsy.

Indigo - of course pinks loves halo :) If you come to London, let me know and I would love to meet you and greet you and give you a big hug :)

Spo - I will. Spirit is not yet ready to fly (and neither is the home office ready to give me my passport) but she is preparing for another adventure.